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Penumbra/Duskshroud
Physical Description Duskshroud is a purebred Havana Brown cat with emerald green eyes and silky, rich chocolate brown fur. Her head is longer than it is wide, as stated within Havana Brown standards. She is a tall and lean cat, built for speed and agility rather than for brute strength, and her ears are a bit larger than other cats, as is also common with her breed. She has the letters "CRPEN" tattooed in her ear from the time when she was living as a show cat (originally named Chocolate Royalty's PENUMBRA), and the very tip of her tail is ticked with white hairs that never grew back the correct color due to a house fire she managed to escape from - and it is these white hairs that disqualified her from being a show cat and led her to wandering off to become a rogue and eventually join Shadowclan. Server History Duskshroud began in the server as a newly-minted Shadowclan Warrior of only three moons, just having survived the reign of the rogues. For more information regarding Duskshroud's past, please refer to the following blog post: Penumbra's Quest/Duskshroud's Origins RP History The most notable of all her first choices was her decision to ask Badgerstar for an apprentice, despite only having been in the clan for four moons. Badgerstar was first unconvinced, but as Duskshroud proved that she was unintimidated by his stature and his distrust, he gave her the right to train the newest apprentice, Sparrowpaw. Her methods of training Sparrowpaw were unique, first teaching him the importance of knowing when to ask for help before beginning more common training practices. She also mentored him in using his surrounding resources to aid his clan, such as how the two rebuilt the Warrior's den after a rather harsh storm. The rebuilding of the Warrior's den was one of Duskshroud's proudest accomplishments, and was a true feat of ingenuity and innovation as she created a sophisticate support system and coated it in a primitive 'brick-like' mixture. During her time in the clan, she made many good friends, including Smallskip, Crowheart, the now deceased Duckbranch and Wolfdusk, the deputy Whitefang, and Badgerstar. Whitefang especially was a large part of her life, as she grew to trust him in a way she had trusted very few others. He was the first she told her true past to, and one she felt she could go to with any troubles she may have had. In many ways, he reminded her so much of Corry that she slowly fell in love with him despite him already having a mate. This troubled her deeply, as after Corry died, she promised herself she would never love again, not to mention he and his mate were some of her best friends, and she knew they loved each other very much. Duskshroud is well trusted by Badgerstar especially, and has been chosen to attend nearly every gathering since he became leader. This fact is yet another that she takes great pride in, and hopes that this along with many of her past actions and future plans will help her rise through the ranks of the clan. However, there was a wrinkle in her plans. A cat named Rice, specifically. He scared her very much - his clear intelligence and unclear intentions and the way he looked spoke to her as though she was prey to be caught. Rice had caught wind of the truth about her past, and in a fateful meeting where he mentioned what information he knew and what his intentions were, she became afraid and in a moment of pure disregard to all instinct, she conceived his kittens. Horrified at what she had done, she ran back into camp in a panic feeling lost and ill. She explained what happened to Whitefang and Duckbranch, then to Badgerstar, and then made a decision that would change her forever. She made an announcement. She told the clan the truth about her past, she bared her soul about who she has become, and she explained what had just happened to her. Afterwards, when she fell asleep, she had a rather disturbing nightmare, but not once did she tell anyone anything about it... Healing took quite a bit of time, and she still continues the process as she reasons with all that had happened and all she was to become. Two days before she bore her kittens, her dear friend Duckbranch bore her own kittens and died before her eyes while giving birth. The image haunted Duskshroud for quite some time, and though she will not admit it, it still does. The death made her feel even worse about the feelings she had for Whitefang, and while she still has those feelings, she represses them entirely for the sake of honoring her dear friend. The birth of her own kittens was something rather unusual. The first three, Budkit, Sootkit, and Ashkit, came surprisingly easy and she took it rather well. The last one, Witherkit, however, forced its way out in a manner so painful that Duskshroud couldn't help but unleash a scream that seemed to echo eerily in the snow-covered forest. Raising them, on the other hand, has been a joy to her. She raises them alongside Duckbranch's kittens, and since becoming a mother herself, she has found within her the spirit her mother had toward her and her siblings - loving, caring, kind, and genuine. Character Development Duskshroud began as a cold, aloof, and stand-offish cat that took her position in the clan more seriously than was needed, effectively brushing aside any personal relationships with most cats. Since the incident with Rice, however, she has learned to open up more and drop the stone-faced facade that she had once portrayed. She is kind, honest, courageous, and deeply, fiercely loyal to her clan. While she adores being able to watch her kittens grow, she feels trapped by being a mother and has ran out to hunt and patrol for the clan during times when she should have been nursing. She feels a strong need for some change within the clan, such as a need for a more structured order to day-by-day business as well as a need for the leaders and deputies to play a more active role in clan life, but she intends to save her thoughts on those matters for a time when her views are needed. Despite the fact that she sometimes wishes things could have been different and that she could have stayed a show cat, she takes even more pride in her life as a Warrior and would not trade it for even the slightest chance to go back to her old life. Quotes 'Duskshroud: '"I would like to discuss the possibility of mentoring my first apprentice." 'Badgerstar: '"You've only been here for less than two seasons. What makes you think you could train an apprentice?" 'Duskshroud: '"With all due respect, Badgerstar, I earned my right to be here. I may not have been born here but that does not make me any less of a part of this clan. My time here may have been so far rather minimal, but I would not have been approved to join in the way I had should I have shown anything less than the highest level of potential and purpose. If you wish for me to prove myself more than I already have, then allow this to be my chance. I will raise him to be the best warrior possible for this clan. For my clan." --Duskshroud while asking Badgerstar for her first apprentice - - 'Duskshroud: '"Once you learn how a crow thinks it becomes much easier to keep yourself one step ahead. It is important, I think, to learn to think like all prey, and eventually even like your enemies. A cat can outsmart even a fox if she has done enough time observing one.I think if we all learned to put ourselves in our opponents paws, either we would not fight as much, or we would never really lose. Then again, maybe I am just crazy. Who is to say, really?" --Duskshroud to Smallskip after a hunting session - - 'Duskshroud: '"You see, Sparrowpaw, being a great warrior is not simply about what you can do and what your abilities are. You must learn to become one with the rest of your clan and understand that there is no shame in asking for help from your clanmates whenever you may need it. We are all here to help you and guide you, and I especially will always be here for you no matter what. And with that, it is also important that you are able to help your clanmates whenever they may need you. We are all one clan, and our companionship is what strengthens us, not our individual abilities. This may very well be the most important lesson I teach you. Do you understand?" --Duskshroud to Sparrowpaw during their first training session - - 'Duskshroud: '"The longer we sit here and wait, the more each of us become like kittypets. I have only the highest of respect for this clan. Cowering here like mice in their holes is beneath us! We are Shadowclan, for Starclan's sake! We face our problems with intelligence and integrity, not with fear and the need to hide away from that which threatens us. Either we start living up to what we are meant to be, or we devolve to something far less honorable. We do not have enough prey to hold us over for even just a few days. We cannot afford to wait here and do nothing but 'build our walls.' You and I have seen this creature's claws! Our walls could never be strong enough to fair against it! Should it come crashing through here, we'd all be as good as dead, Now if you would rather allow us to spend our time just waiting for whatever this damn thing is to destroy us, that is up to you. If you would rather me shut up and waste my time picking ticks, that is fine. But just realize how beneath us and how much of a disgrace it is for us to be sitting here and doing nothing productive for the protective future of this clan." --Duskshroud to Wolfdusk after Badgerstar orders that all cats are required to stay in camp and reinforce the briars hoping to wait out the badger that had been lurking in the territory. - - 'Badgerstar: '"You never fail to amaze me or make me proud, Duskshroud..." "And yes, I know your belly is swelling. I am pleased that you'll be caring for them despite the identity of the father and I'm proud to see that you've grown into a fine Warrior of Shadowclan; one whom I can trust with both tooth and claw.""Remember to tell Whitefang what we have discussed. Rest well, Duskshroud. May St--..." "Rest well." 'Duskshroud: '"Thank you, Badgerstar. I am honored by your kind words, and perhaps even more honored just to be a part of this, the most wonderful clan of all. Don't worry - I too have been doubting Starclan again as of late. But still - may they perhaps set aside this blind eye they seem to be turning upon us and shine their light upon us both once again. I should think we both need it rather severely. Keep your head high, Badgerstar. Let the past be the past, and fight for the future, because the future is all we have to look forward to. Or, at least, that's how I reasoned after I lost the one I loved." --Duskshroud and Badgerstar talking after Duskshroud warned him about Dovepaw. - - 'Duskshroud: '"Show me the way, Starclan. I fear for this queening, and I fear for the kittens I will produce. Send a sign that my nightmare was a cruel trick of the subconscious, and let these little ones grow to serve the clans in only the most noble of ways. Teach me to gaze upon them justly, and to cast aside any consideration of the tom that had sired them. He is not their father, I am steadfast in that belief. He is little more than their donor, and even that I would hesitate to call him. Teach me to love them as mother had loved me, with kindness and encouragement rather than bitterness and resentment. And... please - give Badgerstar the hope he needs to continue to be the strong leader for this clan that I know he can be. Let him break free from grief, and rise up once again to be the formidable tom he always has been and always was meant to be. Guide us all to grow from our pain, and to never let our sorrows control us. We control us - nothing and noone else can, should, or will, so long as we are strong in only the right ways." --Duskshroud sending a prayer to Starclan after her discussion with Badgerstar and a few nights before her queening. Category:ShadowClan